After the complications with Joash's delivery (where his tiny head was dislodged and remained in my womb together with his placenta), Ashley miraculously continued to grow steadily by the weeks (despite the odds being stacked so high against her - the cocktail of drugs administered intravenously to me to combat the infections from the left-over contents, the lack of space for her to grow, the still un-closed cervix etc). Each week, when the ultrasound scan showed that she's going well and gaining weight, our hearts are filled with so much gratitude to God for preserving her life. She was a feisty fighter indeed. At around week 22-23, she was moving so vigorously that even her Daddy could feel her fetal movements while placing his hand on my tummy! Those were such special bonding moments and Daddy would place the CD player near her and start playing Mozart music to her. Then he'll personally sing her his favourite Mauri Lullabys before ending the evening with a prayer. I'll never forget how tender those moments felt...
One of the afternoons as I was listening to the worship CD and reading the Bible while waiting for David to knock off from work, this song struck me as 'Ashley's Song' and I began to listen to it repeatedly and sing it to our baby daily. I felt deeply convinced that God preserved Ashley's life for a purpose - that she will be born as a miracle baby and her testimony will bring Glory to His name. Even as I lay at the OT last Sunday awaiting my emergency C-section, shivering from the painful jabs of the spinal epidural and totally petrified at the thought of losing yet another baby (due to the same circumstance of ruptured membrane), I kept humming this song in my head...May I present to you Ashley's Song - "I was made to Praise You".
I was made to Praise You
I was made to glorify Your Name
In every circumstance,
to find a chance to thank You.
I was made to love You
I was made to worship at Your feet
And to obey You Lord
I was made for You...
Ashley must be sitting on Jesus' lap right now singing this song to Him...Mummy misses you baby and I've not stopped longing for you...